Narcissistic Bedtime Stories: 1st Valentine’s Day

He stood there staring at me, clueless as to why I was so pissed off.

“Seriously? Nothing, huh?”

He shrugged. “It’s a stupid holiday. Well, they all are.”

Why the fuck did I not see this red flag?

Oh yeah. I was 28 years old, didn’t like myself much, and really stupid.

“Not even a Hershey chocolate bar,” I said, sighing and rolling my eyes, two things that I would become great at in the coming years.

He finally became mad instead of his usual steely indifference.

“What? You want me to go to the fucking gas station and get you a candy bar? Will that make you happy?”

Damn. I was so hurt but I wasn’t going to let him know, so I set my face as hard as stone.

“No, fuck off. I don’t want you to get me a stupid candy bar.”

And he didn’t.

Early red flags. Learn them.

I was smug back then, thinking I knew what an abusive man was like. If I had known better that night, I wonder if I would’ve dumped him.

A man does not need to hit, smack, kick, spit, call you names or throw away most of your stuff out of spite to achieve that label.

For the duration of our relationship, I kept sweeping his toxic bullshit under the rug.

Future Valentine’s Day gifts from him only came about due to my consistent nagging and whining. I did not change him or make him see the error of his ways. It was only his way of keeping me quiet. He just went along with the whole thing eventually, so I’d believe that he finally gave a true fuck.

Thus concludes this installment of Narcissistic Bedtime Stories.


  1. Sounds familiar. I went through some of the same stuff with my ex. Red flags for sure but we were too naïve to see them. We learned though. Shame it had to be the hard way. ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  2. What an asshat. It would have been different if you would have told him you didn’t want anything and meant it, but you didn’t. A red flag would also be if he gave you something despite not wanting anything. It’s all about the boundary crossing. I always asked him to treat me right 365 and not just on a holiday, but no. That was the best present ever. Good riddance to asshat.

    Liked by 1 person

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